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The Eastern Advocate


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The Eastern Advocate

Combating the bat problem in Machattie Park became one of the council’s top priorities at the beginning of 2018, yet they have still managed to do nothing about it. That is until now. It is believed that 12 canoes filled with bats have arrived on Australian shores, but they were caught by authorities in the process. The resurgence of bats in Machattie Park due to this migrant influx has forced Australia to develop a long term solution.

For some reason, Bathurst Regional Council has an overriding say on any bat related decisions in Australia, and they came to the conclusion that the bats were to be sent to a detention centre in Nauru. Leader of the bat community, Bronwyn Bat, said she understood the decision, however there is certainly still some tension between the bat and human communities. “Those bloody Bathurstians have done my head in.”

The bats that are currently being housed at Machattie Park are being invited to a weekly trivia night, at which they compete for survival. The bottom three bats in the contest are exiled off the park, and sent offshore. It is a concept similar to that of Australia Idol, and the host of that ever so successful show, Osher Günsberg, is also running proceedings at the trivia nights. “It’s just a great event. But now, it’s time for the bats to say their goodbyes.” 

There are rumours that the trivia night will be turned into a reality television show, where it will be bested in intellectual engagement only by the sociologically fascinating ‘Married at First Sight.’

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