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The Eastern Advocate


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The Eastern Advocate

Bathurst council have questioned the effects that slowing down at traffic intersections has had on productivity, and consequently have abolished orange traffic lights. Traffic lights now operate on a binary function, that being green for go and red for stop.

This has been met with mixed results from the Bathurst community, with some residents rightfully concerned that removing the orange light will have on safety. Mr Al Beback expressed these concerns in an interview with the Eastern Advocate, saying that, “The other day I was driving along William St and I was half-way through the intersection when the light went red. So I stopped, and then got promptly side swiped by the fifteen cars coming the other way. You would have thought that after one hit me the rest would have stopped. But no, apparently people are so busy in Bathurst that they’ll ram you with their Land-cruisers without a second thought.

It is reported that Mr Beback has suffered head trauma, two broken legs that required amputation and a minor nose-bleed.

However the community was not content with the changes made to the traffic lights, so an electrician’s guild has gone undercover to add a bit more vibrancy to our traffic regulations. Thanks to some nifty electrical work, Bathurst’s traffic lights now also feature pink, pastel grey and aubergine as colours. No one, however, is quite sure what they mean, which has led to some confusion among locals.

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